In case you didn’t know it — it is possible to be addicted to Christmas. Certainly, some level of excitement over Christmas is normal, but at what point does it border on unhealthy (or even insane)?
For many individuals, a Christmas addiction poses a greater threat than getting run over by a reindeer. If you want to know what the top six signs of being addicted to Christmas are, read on…
#1 — Boycotting Anti-Santa Malls
If you refuse to shop at a mall that doesn’t have a Santa on duty at all times, you’re probably suffering from a Christmas addiction. (Reality check: Once you hit the age of 7 or 8, you probably don’t need to get your photo taken sitting on Santa’s lap!)
#2 — Spiking Your Eggnog?
If you need spiked eggnog just to make it through your Christmas shopping marathon, it’s a telltale sign that you’re probably addicted to Christmas.
#3 — Desperately Seeking the North Pole
If you’ve tried Googling directions from your house to the North Pole five times and still aren’t sure how to get to Santa’s house, you are probably addicted to Christmas.
#4 — Expecting Mail from Santa
If you check your mail everyday hoping Santa sent you a letter, you should seek help to deal with your Christmas addiction.
#5 — Taking the Christmas Theme Too Far
If you sleep on red and green plaid sheets and wear red and green pajamas with socks and underwear decorated with Santa every night beginning on December 1 until Christmas Eve, you are definitely addicted to Christmas (and you should really keep that secret to yourself).
#6 — Identity Issues
Finally, if you’ve submitted a name-change application to legally change your last name to Clause (and you’re getting all new monogrammed towels embroidered with a red and green ?S? and ?C?), you have some serious Christmas addiction issues.
What Is the Solution for Christmas Addiction?
Eat two Christmas wreath cookies each and every day until December 25th and call me in the morning. It has been documented that Christmas addiction rapidly subsides at 11:59 p.m. on December 25. Take your cookies, drink plenty of eggnog, and wait it out until then.